Solving The Mystery Of April Stools Day

Yesterday, during my daily walk down Wenatchee Avenue, I noticed something rather unusual.

It's not actually too unusual to notice something unusual on Wenatchee Avenue if you look hard enough, even every day, but this bit of unusual was especially qualifying.

Peeking out from behind the topiaries and plopped atop the A-frame signs that are in front of few businesses in the downtown area, I noticed a rubberized toy version of the infamous poop emoji gleefully grinning back at me.

After seeing the first of these little fellers and giving thanks to the gods of defecation that it wasn't a real pile of you-know-what, I assumed it was just one of those random anomalies that cause a passing "huh?". But after I'd spotted two or three lurking within the same block, I knew something bigger had to be afoot - but thankfully not underfoot (even though they were plastic - you can never be too careful :-).

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What could be the reason for the presence of these small vulcanized swirls of thankfully-non-organic ordure?, I thought to myself.

Did something that's much bigger and also made of vinyl actually do its business in front of all these businesses, like something out of a Hollywood sci-fi movie?

Or had the Easter Bunny dropped in on Downtown Wenatchee and hidden something that embodies what he thinks of the skyrocketing cost of eggs instead of the real thing since he can't afford them this year?

Well, as it turns out, neither of those things were true - although the latter is actually a little closer to the real reason behind why these camouflaged clumps of smiling scat were dotting the Avenue.

As it turns out, a quick call to Firehouse Pet Shop was all that was needed to clear up this little whoopsie mystery, as the store's manager - Emily Reeves, doody-fully explained the poopy pals were part of a promotion called April Stools Day.

Reeves said this was the second year Firehouse has hidden the toy emojis along a three-block section of Wenatchee Avenue and offered a $10 gift certificate to anyone who finds one and returns it to the store.

She added that this year's customer success rate during the scat-venger hunt was even better than 2024's, with 25 of the 30 toy doo-doos they dropped having been brought back for the discount.

So, the good news is that my excrement enigma has been solved and there's a few more happy pet owners in the Wenatchee Valley!

But the bad news is...there's still five more piles of plastic poop lingering on Wenatchee Avenue. So let's hope they quietly decide to compost themselves in a local toy bin before summer gets here and the risk of them melting into real puddles of stuff you wouldn't want to step in becomes all too real!